Flirting and Cheating

Flirting: When someone will say just about anything to get a rise out of another person; when someone will build your ego up or “stroke their ego” to make you think that they want you and you are the only one they want. Some may call it harmless, but some like I call those who flirt, “attention seekers”. If you’re in a relationship and claim to be in love with the person you’re with, flirt with them. If not, look in the mirror and flirt with your damn self that way it won’t be disrespectful to the other person.

Cheating: When someone is in a relationship, but they choose to see another on the side; when someone will lie to your face and try their hardest to make a jackass out of you. Some may call it not being satisfied and trying to find that one true soul mate. I like others may call it bulls*** and feel different about cheating. The two words are spelled different and have different meanings, but they seem to be one in the same.

Final Thought: These are two words that I can really relate to based on a few past experiences dealing with some relationships. First, let me share a few examples concerning the word “flirting”. Let’s call the first young lady “Y”. “Y” and I knew each other for awhile and we started dating and we were getting real close. One evening we went downtown to the shops and we went into a store to buy something. The salesman asked if we needed help, I said not right now we were just looking.  He asked her how was she doing, she replied “I am doing alright, how are you doing”. Harmless right? Okay I stepped off to another rack of items yet I noticed that she kept looking at this guy smiling. Next thing I noticed that they’re having a conversation and I hear him asking her if I was her man. “Y” said “something like that”. So the salesman being a man, takes it for what its worth and asked her for her phone number and she gave it to him.  I went over to where she was and  she says “sweetie did you find what you were looking for”. I said “no, but I see that you did”. The salesman said “yo I didn’t know she was your girl and she started flirting with me”. “Y” says “I was only making conversation and trying to get you a discount”. I said “oh really okay why don’t you continue to make conversation with him and see if you can get your ass a discount on a ride home from him, cause I’m gone”. I left her dumb ass standing there in the store and I went home. She called me later and said that she was sorry and wanted to talk. I told her no and not to call me again. It should be noted that I had talked to her friend and told her what happened and she called “Y” and went to pick her up. “Y” told her friend she was wrong and her  friend told her that she deserved to get left.

Years later “V” comes into my life and things were going very well between us. Her smile was wonderful and her body was nice and thick (just the way I like them). We were together for awhile and during that time something happened and I told her we needed a break which only lasted a couple of weeks. We talked and decided to work things out and be together. We were invited to a party and she asked me to pick her and a couple of her girlfriends up from her house. When I got there, she stated they weren’t going so it would just be her and I going. Some of my family members were at the party and a few of their friends attended also. My cousins friend started a conversation with her while at the party. Harmless right? Now she’s sitting beside me and he is sitting across from her. He started flirting with her and she is flirting back. I said to him “yo my man, chill out with that and have some respect”. Even my cousin tells his friend to chill out and don’t disrespect me or “V”.  He says “my bad I’m just talking to her”. “V” starts eating cake and some fell on her shirt with cleavage showing, and in her lap. This dude says to her “damn that cake sure looks good”. “V” says to him while I am sitting right beside her “yeah it taste good, come and lick it off”. Dudes tells her to go outside with him. Now not only did I hear her say that, my family members and others heard her say it also. So the laid back person that I am, left and in comes the I am not going to be disrespected person. I’m like “what the F*** did you just say”. My cousin jumps in his boy’s face and dude says “Yo she flirting with me so I jumped at it”. So those two are going at it while  “V” and I are having words. She said that she was only playing and wanted to see if I would say something. Other females stated that she shouldn’t be disrespectful towards me, let alone call herself just playing. The party had to be shut down and we were about to leave. So me being the gentleman that I am, told “V” I would take her home. Of course, she wants to talk a hole in my head and kept saying that she was sorry. I said nothing to her on the way to her house. We get to her house and she wants me to come in and talk to her about what happened. We go inside and then she wants to kiss all on me and tell me that she loves me and she wants to make love to me and she wants me to make love to her. I said “no no hell no”. I told her to go bake a cake and make love to it, and leave me the f***  alone because I’m done. She called me the next day and said that she was drunk and she was sorry. I said “okay whatever, did you bake your cake and eat it too”. She hung up on me and that was the end of that.

With “L” both flirting and cheating took place during our relationship. She was talking to a guy that she claims she went to school with and he was just her buddy. She said that they had lost contact with each other and he reached out to her. Harmless right? I was over her house one evening and she was on the phone with her so called “buddy”. She had her cell phone on speaker and I could their conversation, yet she acted like I wasn’t even there. Dude asked her if he was with her right at that moment, what would happen. She did the fake ass laugh and said “we would talk about old times” He asked her is that all they would do and what could he do to her while she talked. Again the fake ass laugh came and she said “its whatever and you’re being silly, I will call you back my mom is on the other line”. She got off the phone then she wanted to show me some attention. I wanted to say something, but I didn’t. A few days had passed and I made a reservation for us at a nice restaurant. “L” said she had to take her mom to the hospital because she wasn’t feeling good and she wouldn’t be able to go to dinner.  I asked her if she needed me to go with her. Said no because she was at her moms and she was about to take her to the hospital. I said okay I hoped her mom feels better and I told her to call me later. Of course I had to be understanding, so I called and cancelled the reservation. Later that night guess who called me? It was the mother. Her mom wanted to know if “L” and I wanted to come by her house after we left the restaurant for a night cap and make plans to go out of town with her and her husband. I asked her if she was okay and was she resting after leaving the hospital. She said “honey I’m fine and I haven’t been to the hospital”. I told her that “L” said that she couldn’t go out to dinner with me because she had to take her to the hospital. The mom said that she thought that “L” was with me because she said that we were going out to dinner and when she called her, “L” wasn’t answering her phone so she called my phone. She asked me if everything was alright and had I talked to her. I told her I didn’t know what was going on. I called “L” phone several times and she didn’t answer my calls nor did she respond to my text messages. That inner voice told me to go by “L” house to see if she was there, and after knocking on the door several times, she answered. She asked me why was I there and why was I knocking on her door. I asked her if her mom was okay and why didn’t she answer her phone. She said that her mom was fine and resting and they admitted her in the hospital and her phone battery was dead. I called her mom and put her on speaker so she could talk to her. Her mom said “why in the hell did you say that you had to take me to hospital and why aren’t you answering your damn phone, what’s going on”. “L” stated that she would call her back later. I asked “L” what was going on and before she could say anything, her “buddy” came to the door. He said “hey is everything alright and what’s going on and who was I”. I told him I was her boyfriend and I came by to see what was going because she told me she couldn’t go out with me because she had to take her mother to the hospital. The “buddy” asked “L” why didn’t she tell him she had a boyfriend and why would she lie about taking her mother to the hospital”. He also stated that they had been talking and seeing each other for a few months and she never said she had a boyfriend. All “L” could do was stand there with a dumb ass look on her face and say “I think you both need to leave”. I said “damn you and the air you breath with your lying ass”. and I left. “L” called me a few days later and said that she wanted us to sit down and talk. I told her no I couldn’t sit down with her and talk, because just talking to her on the phone for a few minutes, made me sick to my stomach and I had to go to the hospital, then I hung up the phone. I know this is a very long “final thought” but the memories came back and the juices were flowing. Thanks for reading…

Spread the word and follow me… (M.Bowlding/copyright/8-19-14)        

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